err.. duno..

10:07 PM 4/23/2010

I gta ride this stinky ass bus to class.. and back too.. both times i got caught in the rain.. oddly enuf i was in a pretty oryt mood.. its weird.. the rain acts like a fuse on the dynamite that is my mood.. either it can go spiralling into darkness.. or it can give me wholesome, solid satisfaction.. 2day, thank God.. it was the latter.. i dont like riding this bus, but as usual, my awesome'ness usually gets me a seat.. thank God once again.. anyway.. SL's like any developing country, in the middle of nowhere or rather in an average place, you'll suddenly see these amazing, happening places.. js reminds me how we used ta chill.. =D.. i mean.. im once in again in a tricky position.. i say tricky cos i dont wana use a negative word, cos theres notin rong with this place, just that.. apart frm being alone, i either never have money to do n e tin new or different or dont have the company.. those were the things that usually kept me going.. u know.. even tho ive always had issues holding me back, mainly financial, i always did indulge in random activities to keep me ticking.. over here.. there isnt much.. and i do feel bad sometimes.. wishing i had things to do, or rather luxuries to enjoi.. cos you dont have to look far to see kids who dont even have slippers or people who dont even have homes.. weird.. guess thats why ppl love ignorance.. as long as you dont see ppl suffering.. or being deprived of the simplest of things, you dont have a reason to feel bad innit?

In galle.. me dad's stomping grounds.. no1 really knows me.. they knew me as a kid.. i wasnt really spoilt, but to them i was.. terribly spoilt.. cos i got everythin.. maybe not what i wanted, but what i needed.. thats like what ppl dream in that lil town.. having what you need..

Im going back there 2mm.. i dont like that place too much.. every single person knows me.. neither am i exaggerating nor am i lying.. its because of my dad.. altho not many ppl even know my name.. so i dont like that place too much.. they js call me "Rafeek's Son" ..might as well give me a fucking number..! They are happy to see me, but its js that they happy to see my dad was able to rise out of a village and raise a son who doesnt seem much of a villager.. well, truth is, my dad's still pretty much a villager.. narrow minded.. stubborn.. these are the most basic of his traits.. God bless him tho.. i was explaining to a good frnd of mine.. even tho he isnt a great dad.. he's a great guy.. sadly.. im not a friend..

I was supposed to be writing a mail to a friend.. but i kinda ended up having a conversation to anyone who was willing to listen.. thanks for listening i guess.. till the nxt time..

peace!
RR