Sunday, October 21, 2007

Not Giving Up.. On Nothing..

Well.. like the title says.. again something very awkward & unorthodox..
Its about my exams.. hell.. about my course!
Dont zactly love accounting.. but hell.. aint about my course specifically.. dont understand it.. tis like.. for 1 of the few times, i dont have fear of anything about this.. i aint afraid of failing.. AT ALL!!
I mean, I know, there are some students who use fear as fuel to prepare them for examinations.. for some the fuel injects quite late.. im the latter.. but still.. this late aint even coming! Even after failing.. theres no emotion.. no disappointment.. no regret.. no.. feeling that I must do better the next time!
Ive tried studying.. tried concentrating.. now it doesnt seem like i EVER tried.. but i did.. now Ive kinda given up.. although.. i aint sure if i actually have or not.. =\..
One of my lecturers.. she emphasizes on not giving up.. shes like one of these wannabe motivational ppl.. but mos of the time she seems just an old skool bich! Cant blame her though.. tis part of her job!
When ever she aint a bich.. shes that motivational speaker i was telling you about.. she like quotes sites like "pravs.com".. maybe even "Santabanta.com".. kinda get sick of it though! Its like gettin the same forwarded email ova & ova.. familiarity breeds comtempt.. further familiarity just breeds frustration & anger i guess!! =)
I kept telling myself.. dont give up.. but then it finally hit me.. wt the hell am i giving up on ? =\..
Aint like Im preparing for the exam of life.. geez.. just a freaking subject.. should we really be taking it so the extent where we think about it day & night..? =\ =S
She takes academics to the next level.. and her career.. she thinks its a big deal..
In reality.. she like 30-something.. & she doesnt have anything to reflect upon cept her credentials! I mean, by 30 I'd wanna be married, prolly have a kid or two.. not just coaching students 24/7.. telling them how important passing their examinations and getting good grades are.. whatever happened to having fun.. just relaxing.. to her, working on academics is doing calculations & relaxing is doing theory! =\
Her influence has even spread to a couple of students.. class rep.. i duno if i should give his blog add or not.. but.. he has kinda laid down his "estimated" life.. you know.. when he graduates.. when he gets employed.. when he gets married.. etc etc.. he estimates getting married at 35!!!
YA!! I KNOW!! THIRTY FIVE!!!!
His muscles are going to be quite hard on his preferred hand.. he might even want to turn ambidextrous after making love to himself so many times!
People.. life aint about academics.. or how much money you earn..
Its what type of person you choose to become.. how you sacrifice and compromise for others.. WHAT YOU DO for others.. i mean.. actions speak louder than words innit? =\..
Your actions in this life.. they gna speak me louder.. longer.. & more truthfully than any words you can ever utter!
More than what you say.. becareful what you do..!
Salams + tc
RR

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